20 sarcastic tips to become a popular fashion blogger

January 17, 2011

Fashion blogging, Opinion

1. Wear Jeffrey Campbell Lita boots (this is a MUST).
2. Wear all your rings at the same time. It doesn't matter if they don't match your outfit.
3. Wear that Michael Kors oversized golden watch.
4. When you have no new outfit pictures, do a post showcasing your jewelry collection ...
5. ... or publish an "inspiration" post with 10 completely unrelated pictures and no explanation why you like them. Bonus points if you don't credit the source!
6. Post 50 pictures of one outfit.
7. When you eat out, post badly lit, grainy pictures of restaurant food.
8. Create the illusion that you wear super high heels 24/7 by including them in every outfit shoot.
9. Wear crosses (regardless of your religion or lack thereof).
10. Have a photographer boyfriend with DSLR camera in auto-mode follow you everywhere.

Here it is: a bunch of completely different rings, all on one hand!

11. Put up a disclaimer saying you'll let your readers know if you're paid or compensated to endorse a certain brand or product. Then don't.
12. Wear so many "it" designer items at once that you end up looking like you got your outfit at H&M.
13. Host sponsored giveaways. To enter, people must be your fans on Facebook, follow you on Blogger, Google Friend Connect and Twitter, subscribe via Bloglovin and like the sponsor's Facebook page.
They should also leave a comment listing their favorite item from an online store they don't care about, as well as describing what they would wear it with. Oh, and the giveaway is open to US and Canada residents only!
14. Post pictures of yourself in your bedroom. Pose on your bed to hide the fact that your room is cluttered and untidy.
15. To get more visits, spam other blogs with two-word comments like "great outfit" followed by links to your blog, Twitter and Facebook pages.
16. Post ecstatic quasi-reviews of collections from the brands you want to sponsor you.
17. Wear geeky black thick-rimmed glasses or rapist glasses. Applies especially if you have perfect eyesight and are not actually a geek or rapist!
18. Design a (shoe, clothing, handbag) collection consisting of items you wouldn't look twice at if you saw them in a store.
19. Dress differently in everyday life than in outfit pictures.
20. Own iPads, iPhones and Blackberries. Brag about them regularly by using them in your outfit pictures as "accessories".
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